What I really want to do.....

I just want to sit around and drink coffee today and read a book. I started reading "The Help" and it's pretty good. Had to train my eyes to read black talk, something I haven't done since reading an older version of a  Bobbsey Twins book. I must be feeling lazy today, something a friend of mine indulged a couple of days ago.

The reality is, I am just tired of feeling invaded. In May the Girl and I got sick, she with the flu and me with the cold aspect of her flu. I didn't have any more asthma medicine, since I don't have to use it all the time, and had to call the doctor's office to get a refill. "Wow, it's been a while since the doctor has seen you" they said. So in order to get a any medicine, I had to agree to a visit. It's been 6 years.

So it begins, had to have an ultra sound on the ovaries, a very invasive ultrasound. I know that, given time, the cysts will go away. I keep hearing surgery, I keep saying wait. But after the ultrasound I get to see the "lady doctor" so that she can discuss options. I ain't gonna do surgery.

Then it was mammogram time, something I hate nearly as much as the ultrasound. I hate being handled, exposed and all the humiliation that goes with it. I had a "spot" once, and when they did an extraction, it turned out to be calcuimn. Oh, that was after having to wait 3 weeks to have it done after the news, and then had to wait 2 more weeks for the results. It was a pitiful time, and there was so much other stuff going on that demanded my emotions that I never want to repeat that. Breast cancer doesn't run in my family, but that didn't make the wait any more pleasant.

Then yesterday, I had the pleasure of my very first sigmoidoscopy.  This experience was a total joy. The prep on the day before is a sign of the Apocalypse. The Nasty Drink, magnesium citrate, is far above the cola prep you drink when you are pregnant. I don't like clear sodas, and this was nothing like one, except they try to make it one. You have an hour to get it down, so you know it's just nasty. I finally resorted to using a straw, which the Girl suggested, to get it all down. Then, about an hour later, the fun begins! Just when I think there is nothing left, the next morning I got to use 2 enemas. Now there's nothing left, time to go see the butt doctor. More invasive humiliations and they call me good. I told the doctor that colon cancer doesn't run in my family.

My finale destination is the gynecologist, another favorite appointment, where more personal space is invaded. How many times must I have to find my happy place? It's no wonder that I have a desire for a lazy day... I don't want to think about these sorts of appointments. Some girls charge clients lots of money to have themselves oogled at, most people have this sort of behavior in people arrested and sent to jail and then there are those who call it medicine and we pay them. I can't stand it. I am a private person, please respect that.

All this because I didn't keep my asthma medicine current  and my office visits regular.